This Week's Picks

The Democratic National Convention is being held this week and there has been this effort to reintroduce President Obama to the American people. Mrs Obama spoke, with great effect, about what a swell guy the President is just like Mrs. Romney did last week. Except Mrs. Romney spoke about her husband, Mitterjohn “Mitt” Romney. Mrs. Romney said Mitt was, now get this, a great guy and that he’s only given cancer to a couple of women with his Latter Day Saint Cancer Rays.

What cracks me up, especially about the Democrats, is the on one hand, The President is the greatest thing since sliced bread but on the other hand he's just a regular guy that has struggled like you and me. “When Barack was growing up, his family didn’t have remote control TV. No, he had to get up and walk over to the TV set and turn a knob to find a channel. And there wasn’t a 24 hour sports network. No, he had to wait until Saturday before he could watch any sports. And he only had one Coke to choose from. If he wanted a Diet Coke, he had to drink a Tab.”

This Week’s Picks!

Dawgs vs. Misery: This is Missouri’s first SEC conference game. Even though Missouri is west of the Mississippi in what is commonly called the Midwest, they are in the Eastern Division of The SEC. The SEC is good at football, not so hot in geography. Missouri is going to be up for the game, but UGA is just a better team. Georgia wins.

Bees vs. The Frozen Chosen: Georgia Tech almost beat Virginia Tech even though they wore weird looking helmets. The rest of the schedule is going to be easier for Tech starting this week with Presbyterian College whose starting quarterback is Tim Keller (ha, ha, just a little Presbyterian humor). Tech is predestined to win.

Wartigers vs. The Other Dogs: In their home opener last week against Jackson State, Mississippi State had some Division One BCS Student-Athletes fall down like a deck of cards after running through the artificial smoke at the start of the game. I guess they need to do more “run on to the field” drills. Meanwhile, Auburn lost last week to a team coached by a man named “Dabo”. MSU wins

Downtown School vs. Lil’ Dooley: Georgia State’s head coach, Bill Curry played for Bobby Dodd, Vince Lombardi, and Don Shula while being the center for quarterbacks like Bart Starr and Johnny Unitas. Tennessee’s head coach, Derek Dooley, wears orange pants. Tennessee wins.

Bamy vs. Directional Kenyucky: One of the producers of a sports talk radio show here in Atlanta is such a big Bama fan that he has to take Xanax before an Alabama football game. If he has to take one before this game, he needs an intervention. Bama wins.

Ellessyou vs. Wooshington: If you want, you can pay money to belong to The ESPN Insider which features an article titled, “Washington’s mission versus LSU”. I’ll save you some money-Washington’s mission is to stay alive. LSU wins.

Turkeys vs. Austin Peay: Virginia Tech is helping out little old Austin Peay, a smaller school in Tennessee. Yes, Peay is pronounced “Pea” and their cheer is “Lets go Peay”. Really. Here is what is interesting: Austin Peay was a popular Governor of Tennessee who died in office. He was succeeded by the Lt. Governor, Irwin Nation of Yellow River, Tennessee. Governor Peay’s daughter, Ida, married Horace Freeley. She was known as “Ida Peay-Freeley”. Where was I? Oh, the game: Virginia Tech wins.

Georgia Southern vs. The Citadel: The tweet of the football season came from “Erk Russell Statue” (name for the bust of the legendary coach of Georgia Southern Erk Russell). It said, “Sweating my brass off”. Georgia Southern (Alma Mater: “Red Solo Cup”) won with ease last week. They’ll do the same this week. Eagles win.