The Next Stage

Two weeks ago, I was sitting at my desk at work. I had just gotten a cup of coffee since I was going to work a little longer that day. I had my ear buds in and I was listening to iTunes on my phone.

There's a statement 16 year old Alan never thought in a million years he would ever say as 55 year old Alan. I was listening to songs on my phone. Back when I was growing up, all phones were landlines and came in one color: black. Sure, they "had" other colors like red and green, but those were for rich people.

A call came through. It was my wife.

I think Caller ID is an amazing, miraculous invention. Now, you don't HAVE to answer the phone. You can let it go to Voice Mail. Again, and it wasn't that long ago, that you HAD to answer the phone because it might be someone important.

I thought it was odd. My wife usually calls me at the office number, not on my cell phone. Then, I heard a voice I hadn't heard before.

In that split second, a million ideas, none of them pleasant, went through my mind. The main theme of all of those thoughts was something bad had happened to my wife.

The voice identified herself as someone who works with my wife and explained my wife's father had died. She said my wife was very upset. I asked if she wanted me to come pick her up. I heard "Yes" and I could picture my wife shaking her head.

I told my boss I had to go. But I had to shut down my computer and finish my cup of coffee. My boss asked what I was waiting on. I told her about the coffee. She gave me a Styrofoam cup and told me to leave.  

I was walking to my car and I called my wife back. She had gotten over the initial shock and asked me to meet her at her father's house. I went to her father's house.

I called our son and told him. He said he would meet us there.

I got there first. There was a police car. Two officers were inside. They explained that while it was technically a crime scene, the detective (who had just left) is about 100% sure it was natural causes. A neighbor that regularly checks on him, found him dead. They wanted a family member to identify him.

They took me back to a bedroom. There he was.

You always wonder what you would say in a moment like that. I said, "Yep, that's him." Brilliant, I know.

Now it has been two weeks.

We have been going through the house. The man must have kept everything he ever bought.

He had not one, but two copies of John Denver's Greatest Hits. One on "vinyl" and one on CD. I never knew he liked John Denver.  He also had a copy of Englebert Humperdinck's  After The Lovin'.  Englebert just didn't seem like his type of guy.

The man was never at a loss for a ladder. I counted five. And if you need a screwdriver, I think I know where you can find one at. 

We opened one drawer. It was full of tax returns. One was from when Jimmy Carter was President. If the IRS is going that far back on you, you are in trouble.

My wife and her family are working on the estate. It is going to be a challenge but it will get done.

Two weeks after the day, we met a couple for dinner. They have two kids. All have graduated from college, like my son. They have a son that is married. They are empty nesters like we will be in a few months.

The husband was the executor of his father's estate. He gave us a few pointers  and related his experience.

I left our meal thinking about the stages of life. We're in school. We pair up. We marry. We buy houses. We have kids. We go to school plays. We go to baseball games and football games. We turn around and the kid has sideburns and a girl friend. We turn around again and the kid has a degree and a fiance. We bury our parents.

Here we are at another stage of life. Some stages are simply more fun than others.