Monday, December 28, 2020

2020 Goodbye And Good Riddance

 

As I have mentioned a few million times before, I majored in History in college.  Therefore, I think I know what History will say about 2020 years from now. 

History will say 2020 was the suckiest year that ever sucked. 

Oh sure, other terms will be used.  Dumpster fire in the middle of a Sharknado with the sharks pooping is one that comes to mind. 

It was one of those years in which everything goes wrong.

Of course, everything didn't go wrong in 2020.  Bernie Sanders was not elected President of the United States. A gigantic meteor didn't hit earth either. Carole Baskin didn't win Dancing With The Stars. Other than that, 2020 was a year "Murphy's Law" was in effect and was in force.

It didn't start off too bad for us. My wife and I went to New York and met actor Ed Harris. We had a nice conversation with him about the movie "Radio".

When we came back home to Georgia, I checked Twitter and learned Kobie Bryant had died in a helicopter crash.

The year took out some of my favorites: John Prine, Jerry Jeff  Walker, and Billy Joe Shaver.  

The year began with a political double whammy.  One was the impeachment of President Trump based on the high crime and misdemeanor that President Trump was President Trump.  After several weeks, the Republican Senate, (surprise, surprise) voted to acquit President Trump. The day after the acquittal, President Trump gave a speech, at The White House, calling the whole thing "Bull (bleep)" on live TV. Nobody seemed surprised.

Then the Democrats held their primaries and it seemed that the long, long, long, long, long career of Joe Biden was finally over but then they realized he was the only candidate that could possibly beat President Trump because all of the rest were unknowns, kooks, and socialists.   They woke Joe up and pronounced him the winner and he stayed in his basement for most of the year.

However, none of this prepared us for that day in March when we heard something called "Covid 19" was really, really bad and would even infect cool people like Tom Hanks.

Somehow, this made people run out and buy toilet paper. 

They shut down small businesses, churches, and synagogues because they were not essential. Target and Wal-Mart were essential.

Schools shut down and parents had to figure out who was going to stay home with the kids and help them on their Zoom classes. There has never been a time in which I was more thankful not to have a kid in school.    

Of course, President Trump provided the calm, reassuring leadership we have come to expect from him. Oh sure, maybe he did, just spitballing an idea, suggest we could inject disinfectant to kill the virus. But the man is a doer! 

We got to know people like Dr. Anthony Fauci who advised us to:

1. Wash our hands for four hours when we touch a door knob.

2.  Wear a mask everywhere, even if you live alone and you are taking a shower.

3.  Social distance! You should shop for groceries, in your car, wearing a mask.

For his part, the Democratic nominee said that he would handle the pandemic differently. Biden said he would:

1.  Tell people to stay inside and wash their hands every five minutes whether or not they touched anything.

2.  Everybody wears a mask at all times. 

3.  Just admit you're going to get it and you will die so go ahead and make final arrangements.

The virus was a persistent little Booger McFarland and various waves came which caused some states like California and New York to still have the strict rules they had in March and April which they said would wipe out Covid, but it didn't because, you know, Trump, and Joe Bob didn't wear mask at the grocery store.

Liberal Democratic politics were strangely immune to Covid 19.  Cletus and them at an Arkansas pool would cause a spike in Covid cases.  People sharing the same champagne bottle after the results of the election was announced didn't. 

As I alluded in the previous paragraph, some people were really excited over the election results. 

If you didn't hear, Joe Biden  and his running mate, Senator Cackle of California, won the election. Of course, President Trump handled his defeat in the gracious way we expected from him by claiming:

1.  He won, by a lot.

2.  There was a lot of cheating .

3.   Republican office holders that certified the election results were actually "RINOS" (Republicans In Name Only) and should have done more to help the President cheat win.  

As of this writing, President Trump still hasn't conceded and there still are some out there that think Trump will still pull out a victory because he's Trump and can declare martial law because he lost an election.

Some reports have Trump running again in 2024 when he'll still be a spry 78 year old like President-I Guess-Elect Biden.  Gee, there's a pleasant thought.

Seriously, things weren't all bad. It could have been much worse and we have a vaccine that's out that will get us back on track.  So cheer up America!  By this time next year, we won't have to wear a mask to take a shower in our home. Maybe.



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