Sunday, March 15, 2015

She's No Bill

The latest scandal involving a Clinton (and isn't that a phrase we learned how to cut and paste) has erupted over Hillary Clinton conducting government business over a private email.

From ABC  News

She may have been fundraising for The Clinton Foundation, which supposedly is doing wonderful things around the world with the money from despicable people. Or she may have been discussing Benghazi or rather, discussing how to make Benghazi no big deal . Or, if you listen to her, she was sending 30,000 emails about her mother's funeral or Chelsea's wedding. Or sending a "personal" email to President Bill.

What would a personal email from Hillary Clinton to President Bill look like?  "Hey, stuck in Munich. Again. :(  Hope you enjoyed going to Little Rock. Love ya- H"

Or would it be:  "That little tart BETTER BE out of the house when I get home!- H"

As we all know, Hill's and Bill's marriage has been one that is either "a mystery" to quote George Stephanopoulos or one of convenience to quote everybody else on the planet. Bill needed Hillary to sweep away his Southern Horny Frat Boy reputation and Hillary needed Bill to prove to everyone that she is a heterosexual. (That's just a joke, son, just a joke.)

However, in one way, Bill has it way over Hillary and that is in lying.

A lie, in President Bill's hands, was truly a incredible work of art.  He was a master at it.

Take his famous "Ah, dad naught have sacks wid that woemun, Miz Lewinsky" (Translation for the Southern Impaired: "I did not have sex with that woman, Ms. Lewinsky.") statement.


He looked straight at the camera. He pointed his crooked index finger at the camera as if to say, "You little idiot, HOW DARE YOU EVEN THINK OF SUCH A THING!".  He then pounded the podium to emphasize his point. Not only did he not have sex with that woman, he wouldn't even think to have sex with that or any woman besides his darling Hillary, who was stupid hot back at Yale. (That's another joke, son, just a joke.)

This is what stupid hot looked like in 1969

It made you sorry that it was brought up. Sorry, President Bill, go on with your President Bill stuff and we'll leave you alone.

Of course, as we learned later, President Bill did not have sex with that woman because he didn't think that counted as sex when even the educated fleas that do it count it as sex. So in President Bill's mind, he wasn't really lying, per se, it was just a disagreement on definitions.

Hillary's press conference last week didn't even come close to the artistry of President Bill. She looked tired. She acted like a victim, which she learned from President Bill, but she really didn't do very well.

In her book It Takes A Village, Hillary relates her first nursing experience with Chelsea. “There I was, trying to breast-feed my baby [Chelsea], and all of a sudden she starts foaming at the nose. The nurse surveyed the scene and said, ‘Mrs. Clinton, it would help if you lifted her head up.’ All those years of education, all those degrees, it was no help. For all the talk about family values in this country, we do so little to value families.”

This is an interesting passage. The education and degrees that were of little value was Hillary's. The education and the degrees of the nurse came in handy. The sentence:  For all the talk about family values in this country, we do so little to value families” is a little odd to me. Was it society's fault that the first nursing experience wasn't this grand and glorious moment?  Hillary sounds like she would have done it right if it hadn't been for these darn Republicans.

She also sounded like she didn't know what she was talking about. The whole idea that she thought she would need two "devices" (smart phones) for two separate e-mail addresses is laughable. Here's a woman that we have been told for decades is one of the best and the brightest in this country actually thought she would need two smart phones for two email accounts?

Democrats are always talking about how Republicans are not smart enough. Dan Quayle. Sarah Palin. George W. Bush.  Yet, Hillary Clinton thinks you need two smart phones to have two email accounts. To me, that's worse than misspelling potato.

Or does she know it is not true and thinks you're too dumb to care. I am betting on that.


No comments:

Post a Comment