P.J.

 

A few weeks ago, out of nowhere, came the news that P. J. O'Rourke died.

It is hard to describe the hole this has left because O'Rourke was not only a talented writer, he was funny, as we used to say, as all get out.

He came up through the ranks of National Lampoon magazine. It was The Onion on steroids. Everybody was fair game for that magazine. Republicans, Democrats, hippies, straights, the religious, the non-religious, everybody was goofed on and made fun of.

He kept that spirit of the fair game throughout his career, calling Jimmy Carter "goofy tooth" and likening Trump to a toddler at the top of the stairs.

He noted the most dire environmental predictions are always 15 years in the future- far enough out that it is hard to remember when the predictions don't come true.

He noted that when famous people talk about being reincarnated, they were always a prince or princess in their former life. They were never just a regular old person because these people are always special.

But P.J. was mainly about writing in an honest, humorous way. He took a big hit when he announced he would vote for Hillary Clinton in 2016. He said,  "I am endorsing Hillary, and all her lies and all her empty promises. It's the second-worst thing that can happen to this country, but she's way behind in second place. She's wrong about absolutely everything, but she's wrong within normal parameters."

Who is out there that can replace P.J. O'Rourke? 

Nobody.

The best way to remember P.J. O'Rourke is to read his books.  If you can't read his books, the following are a few quotes I've cobbled together.

 "Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them."

 "Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power."

 "The principal feature of contemporary American liberalism is sanctimoniousness. By loudly denouncing all bad things — war and hunger and date rape — liberals testify to their own terrific goodness. More important, they promote themselves to membership in a self-selecting elite of those who care deeply about such things. People who care a lot are naturally superior to we who don’t care any more than we have to. By virtue of this superiority, the caring have a moral right to lead the nation. It’s a kind of natural aristocracy, and the wonderful thing about this aristocracy is that you don’t have to be brave, smart, strong or even lucky to join it, you just have to be liberal."

 “We acknowledge the Bible as the word of God.  And -- the one attribute that we absolutely share with our Creator -- we have a sense of humor.  Right off the bat there's Genesis 1:27: ‘God created man in his own image.’ And then I look in the mirror.”

 "Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys."

" This brings us to a more drastic method of getting an audience: be one. Listen patiently while other people tell you about themselves. Maybe they’ll return the favor. This is risky, however. By the time they get done talking about themselves and are ready to reciprocate, you may be dead from old age. Another danger is that that if you listen long enough you may start attending to what’s being said. You may start thinking about other people, even sympathizing with them. You may develop a true empathy for others, and this will turn you into such a human oddity that you will become a social outcast."

 "We had a choice between Democrats who couldn’t learn from the past and Republicans who couldn’t stop living in it, between Democrats who wanted to tax us to death and Republicans who preferred to have us die in a foreign war. The Democrats planned to fiddle while Rome burned. The Republicans were going to burn Rome, then fiddle."

 "The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it."

 "It is a popular delusion that the government wastes vast amounts of money through inefficiency and sloth. Enormous effort and elaborate planning are required to waste this much money."

"Politicians are interested in people. Not that it is always a virtue. Fleas are interested in dogs."