I can't wait for 2017 to end.
It began with the inauguration of Donald Trump. The inauguration was a solemn occasion, as evidenced by former President Bush trying to put on a poncho, which, in all fairness, wasn't taught at Yale. And by Kellyanne Conway wearing something she found at a Goodwill store when she time traveled back to 1977.
President Trump began his inaugural address by noting, "There are forty trillion zillion billion people here wanting to see me" and ended it by saying "Wrestling is real to me, damn it".
You figured The Democrats would try to present themselves as mature and thoughtful people. You figured wrong. The Democrats decided to hook up with "The Resistance Movement" which features people way more insane than the President wearing hats that look like genitalia and wishing someone would blow up The White House.
So, for the entire year, it seemed like one half of the country was yelling at the other half of the country.
Everything was an argument. Everything was a debate.
Nobody wanted to concede a point because, if you did, you would die.
Your humble correspondent has been caught up in a couple of scrums, even though I find them distasteful.
I've noticed the "resistance" side is quick on the lectures,which are usually very long, and quick on the assumptions, which are usually incorrect. One person wrote a four or five paragraph response to my posting that I voted for Gary Johnson and not Trump asserting that I favored "campus rape" and caused Clinton to lose Wisconsin, which is an amazing feat considering I don't live in Wisconsin.
On to more pleasant memories. Here's some chicken salad out of chicken feed: The Atlanta Falcons won an overwhelming majority of the quarters in the Super Bowl.
Speaking of disasters, somehow, a fire caused a portion of a bridge on Interstate 85 to collapse in Atlanta. In uncharacteristic fashion Atlanta and the state of Georgia got the bridge repaired in a relatively short period of time, which is amazing when you consider it was Atlanta and Georgia making the repair.
It was reported that Democratic Senate staffers were sending "talking points" to Jimmy Kimmel, who is kind of/sort of this generation's Johnny Carson except he doesn't have a lot of talent and he's smug.
There have been several "special elections". One was here in Georiga which featured Jon Ossoff and Karen Handel, which seemed to go on for about 40 years. Ossoff lost mainly because he looked like he was running for student council President and he didn't live in the district and/or Georgia.
The Democrats finally scored a big victory when they captured Jeff Sessions seat in Alabama. In crack journalistic work, it was discovered forty years ago Roy Moore had an unusual interest in teenage girls when he was a thirty-year-old man. This happened to be discovered a month before the election, as chance would have it. So, the Democrats finally were able to defeat the Republicans in Alabama when the Republicans nominate a possible/maybe/probable pedophile.
The biggest story of the year, besides the President, was the #Metoo movement which arose from the amazing discovery that all men are pigs, especially the ugly ones with lots of power.
The biggest movie of the year had to be "The Last Jedi" which is the latest installment of The Star Wars saga. I haven't seen it yet. I hear it is either the worst movie ever or the best movie ever. I did go and see "Despicable Me 3" which was okay; it needed more minions.
We lost a lot of famous people this year. Chuck Berry and his duck walk. Mary Tyler Moore and her smile that could turn on the world. Glen Campbell was probably as underrated as a musician could be (um, he couldn't read music.) Tom Petty, who once said he gave up playing "Pac-Man" when he realized he was just getting good at eating dots. Hugh Hefner who probably, for better or worse (and this old moralistic conservative says worse) changed our culture.
My 40 year high school class reunion was this year. I was amazed I went to school with so many old people. Ha, ha. It was my honor to be the host of the reunion program and I'm happy to say my former classmates laughed at my jokes. A couple of them told me they were happy I finally got some action. (Not as happy as me!)
We had five people from the class die in a five-month period. One of the classmates that died was Barry Suttle, who was a friend of this blog.
I have been writing in a blog for about eight years. Barry always encouraged me and commented on my posts. Men my age are usually not encouraged to do too much except to get out of the way.
This year has been, as far as readership is concerned, the best year for Humor Me. I have easily doubled my readership.
In fact, one of my posts had almost four thousand reads. It was about Barry.
