For those of you that don't live in the Atlanta area, there is a special election to fill the seat of former Representative current Secretary of Health and Human Services Dr. Tom Price. Aren't we lucky? We get to see all of the commercials!
The following is a transcript of my day in front of the TV Set trying to find something to watch.
"Hello, I'm Jon Ossoff. I'm running for the seat in whatever district this is to make a difference. Also a change. I'm willing to work with anyone, including all Democrats and maybe some of those stinky Republicans that want children to starve. I'm Jon Ossoff, and I approved this message because I want to make a difference. Also, a change."
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"My name is Karen Handle and you have got to elect me to something, OK?! OMG, I lost to Nathan Deal who has the personality of a tree stump. OMG. Give me a break, will ya. I'm Karen Handle and I approved this message because-OMG- I need a break."
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"Karen Handle has expensive tastes. She won't buy the store brands. NO! She has to buy the name brands. Karen Handle thinks she is sooooooooo much better than us. Paid for by the Committee That Thinks Karen Handle is Stuck Up."
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"Jon Ossoff. He is about 14 years old and doesn't even have a driver's license. He's thinks he's so cool 'cause he made of movie. He's also is in an inappropriate intimate relationship with Nancy Pelosi. Doesn't that make your flesh crawl? Nancy Pelosi. Intimate relationship. Jon Ossoff. Doesn't it make you sick? Paid for by Georgians Against Nancy Pelosi Having Intimate Relationships With Skinny Young Men".
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"While the state of Georgia was undergoing a budget crisis, Karen Handle was buying expensive chairs and lighting cigars with one hundred dollar bills given to her by the taxpayers. She was laughing with that awful laugh of hers, enjoying every second of wasting your hard earned taxpayer money. Karen Handle. My mother won't let me use the word that describes her".
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"I'm Jon Ossoff and I'm sitting on a porch of a house that may or may not be in whatever district this is and I want to tell you my plan. 1) Buy a house in whatever district I represent in Congress. 2) Deal with the fraud and waste in government by telling the government not to waste money. I would tell people that want to defraud the government they can't do it. 3) Switch all government cell phones to Sprint."
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"My name is Dr Gyno and I'm real concerned about Karen Handle because she wants to cut funding to Planned Parenthood. You can't argue with me because I'm a doctor. Also, I had breast cancer. Boo-Ya!"
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"Jon Ossoff.Look at him. Has he worked a day in his life? Honestly?
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"Karen Handle. The most dangerous place on earth is standing between Karen Handle and a box of donuts."
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"Jon Ossoff not only watches 'Twin Peaks' but he enjoys and understands it. What a weirdo!"
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"Karen Handle likes expensive cars so she can run over kittens. Is that the type of person we want in Washington? A kitten killer? Paid for by The People Against Kitten Killers in Congress"
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"You know what Jon Ossoff needs? A good sock in the snoot to wipe that Georgetown smirk off of his face".
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"Karen Handle. My God"
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Hilarious!
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